Welcome

Hello, and welcome to my blog! I'm not sure exactly what I'll be writing about, but with the project I've been working on for the past 7 months recently announced, I felt compelled to finally start one. Of course, it has taken me almost a week to get my blog up and running - more on that in future blog entries...

Serchie

Monday, October 13, 2008

I escaped abuse

Zuni witnessed domestic violence at home and was then hit by her own controlling boyfriend.

From the ages of 7 to 13, I was abused by my step-dad. In the beginning we got on well but he would shout all the time and scare me. He then would occasionally slap my mum and before long he was beating her up.

Francesa when she was scouted at the train station

I had a lot of problems with school whilst this was going on, I didn't always want to go in, and when I was in I couldn't concentrate properly. I was often covered in bruises from my stepdad and felt embarrassed about what was happening at home.

I felt like I couldn't talk to anyone about it. When I was 14 I started going out with a 17 year-old boy, we were together whenever we could be and when we were apart we were constantly on the phone to each other.

“I recognised my step-dad in my boyfriend”

Things started to change

After a while he became very controlling, about what I wore, whom I spoke to and who I was friends with.
He used to take my phone from me and read my text messages and call log. I used to delete most messages I sent and received just in case it made him angry.

On one occasion he slapped me in front of his friends because he said I 'answered him back'. Because I had seen this happening to my mum, I thought it was normal, but when I asked my friends if this had happened to them they said it hadn't.
I knew something wasn't right, I felt confused.

Staying away

Becky - Francesa's model scout

I recognised my step-dad in my boyfriend and this scared me. Eventually everything got too much for me and I took an overdose. I was rushed to hospital.

My boyfriend never came to see me even though he knew what had happened, and I finally realised that the relationship had to end. I could not carry on living in fear of the abuse I had watched my mum go through, so after this I stayed away from him.

My advice

I was lucky I got out of this. But others might not have the courgare I did. If you think you that your boyfriend is treating you badly then don't stick around to find out how bad it gets. Ask a friend for help, a teacher, or anyone you think you can confide in because the abuse won't just go away.

I think it's really important for you to know what a healthy relationship is really like and that you don't have to put up with being treated badly, like I did. Everyone deserves a life free from abuse.

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